You Could Be Happy
by God-of-goats-loves-books
Summary: Just a sad little oneshot songfic about Fang and Max. I was listening to this song and thought it could work so I just went for it.


**Ok, my writers block from My Waking Nightmare is sticking so I'm going to write this songfic to keep in practice. ****It's sort of playing off the idea of My Waking Nightmare because I was sitting listening to this song and it hit me. The song is 'You Could Be Happy' by Snow Patrol.**

I sat on the ground outside our house thinking about the way my life had been before Fang had left. Thinking about how life had been before we had started to argue about everything. Before we changed. I remembered watching him slam the door as he left the house. How I had screamed after him not to bother coming back. How I hadn't stopped crying for days afterwards. How empty the house had felt without him. Even with the Flock. I wondered what he was doing now. Had he found someone else? Was he happy? I'd never know now.

_You could be happy and I won't know  
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go._

We had argued so much. About everything. About such stupid things. What rooms everyone got in the house? Did we still need to do watch? What color to paint the front door? Who was on laundry? Where the younger ones would go to school? Eventually we just argued about our habits. I yelled at him for wearing black, even though that was one of the things I loved about him. He yelled at me to cut my hair. I yelled at him to stop yelling in front of the little ones. In the end he had left over an argument about how he hadn't bought milk when I'd asked him to. Milk! I had never cried so hard about milk before. I wished I could rewind it all. Take back the things I screamed at him. _  
__  
And all the things that I wish I had not said,  
Are played in loops till it's madness in my head._

We had been so happy before. The Flock had been happy. We were finally safe. We had family. We had a home. Fang and I were dancing around our feelings for each other until one day we had been caught in the rain coming back from the shops and he had pulled me in under some trees to stay dry and we had started to kiss. It had been one of the happiest moments of my life. I had just melted into his arms. When it was over we both knew. But we said it anyway. We were in love. Hopelessly in love. But we were so stressed we didn't even get to talk for a long time. There was so much to do. There just never seemed to be time for us. We were both under a lot of pressure to take good care of the Flock. We started arguing after only a few months. We had always argued a lot but these were a lot worse. Because we couldn't seem to forgive each other. We were both so stupidly stubborn.

_  
Is it too late to remind you how we were?  
But not our last days of silent screaming blur.  
_

But that was just the stress, the anxiety. We had been so happy. Remembering our kiss under the trees made me sure we were right but something had gone wrong. Something we just hadn't had the time to fix. Never enough time. We didn't have enough time. And the last thing I had yelled after him was not to come back. But that was all I wanted. I wanted more time. I wanted him to come back. I should have stopped him but I was so angry at the time. Now I was just sad. So incredibly sad.

_  
Most of what I remember makes me sure  
I should've stopped you from walking out the door._

I was so happy with Fang. I hoped he was happy now, wherever he was. Even if . . . even if he had found someone else. It had only been two weeks though. Surely he couldn't have found someone else so fast. But I still couldn't get the images of him kissing someone else out of my head. Someone like Lissa, who wouldn't argue with him. Who would just agree with whatever he said. But I wasn't that girl. I could never be that girl. I had to be me. And me was as stubborn as h e double hockey sticks. I shouldn't have pushed him so hard though. I shouldn't have said I hated him. I shouldn't have done a lot of things. I didn't hate him, I couldn't. I loved him so much it hurt. _  
_

_  
You could be happy I hope you are  
You made me happier than I'd been by far  
_

My clothes still smelt like Fang, and my room. Whenever I caught his smell I would turn around hoping. But it was always just one of those places he had left his mark. Like his place on the couch in the living room or the cupboard beside the fridge he used to lean on just before dinner when Iggy was cooking, the swing he built for Gazzy in the backyard, the doll he'd bought Angel for her birthday, the bed he fixed in Nudge's room and the place on my bed he sat when we had our midnight talks, before the kiss, when we weren't always too tired.

_  
Somehow everything I own, smells of you  
and for the tiniest moment it's all not true_

He was probably happier without us. We only held him back. He would be better off without us. No little kids to look after. No blind kid to help around the house whenever you bought furniture. No stupid friend to yell at him for every little thing. No milk to buy. He could go and learn the guitar like he always said he'd like to try. Or he could even go write a book about girls and how much they suck. He doesn't have to worry about us anymore. He can do anything he likes. With almost no consequences.

__

Do the things that you always wanted to  
Without me there to hold you back, don't think just do

I'd love to see him make a difference or do what he loves. At least then I'd know he was happy or that he was even alive. He doesn't even need to come back. He doesn't even need to say he still loves me. I could be happy if I just knew he was happy. But I'll never know now.__

More than anything I want to see you go  
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world

I hadn't even noticed it had started to rain. I was still sitting on the muddy grass and the tears rolling down my cheeks were blurring my vision. I felt someone touch my shoulder. I looked up into a pair of dark eyes. I smiled at Fang.

"You came back."

He smiled. "Of course. Always."

"Why?" I asked

"Because I love you." he said and I kissed him. Right there, out in the rain. And he kissed me back. When we broke apart, he tucked my hair behind my ears.

"Why are you still crying?" he whispered.

"Because I love you too." I whispered back. And he smiled.

"Let's go back inside before you catch a chill." He said and he took my hand, helping me up. We walked back to the house hand in hand and when we got inside he went straight to the fridge. I sent him a questioning look and he laughed. He took a plastic bag out of his bag and showed me the contents. Then I started laughing and I kissed him even harder then before and we went to tell the Flock he was home. But not before he put the milk in the fridge.

**Haha, I was bored and as I said I got writer's block. I don't think it's any good. But it has certainly helped my block. While I was writing this I thought of lots of good ways to write my next few chapters. So I should update soon and I apologise for the wait. Enjoy this anyway. I might do some more songfic's later. Funnier ones. Cat**


End file.
